Friday, November 02, 2007
Sunday, October 21, 2007
POTs
Calling all professionals of tomorrow...POTs Conference 2007!
Peaceheaven, Genting 12th - 16th Oct 2007
Pick up point: KL Sentral 
At Peaceheaven: The coveted i lamp (i stands for identity, in training & impact)Welcomes 3 tracks....
ToT's: Teachers of Tomorrow
HOT: Healthcarers of Tomorrow
(that's right, I'm HOT! :))
LoT's: Lawyers of TomorrowWhat's exciting?
Exposition on the book of Nehemiah by Bishop Hwa Yung!!
MIA: Missing in Action
Workshops & forum for each track
Games: Pingpong softball, tiga kaki futsal & dodgeball
Plenaries for each tract
Small groups(3 in 1) & Buzz groups(separate tracks)
More pics: curtesy of Timothy Cheng
Day 1 opening worship & challenge: Call to be professionals of tomorrow
Day 2 MIA: Missing grace
Are race relations any better after 50 years? Do we hear the call to love despite injustice and inequality?
Day 3 MIA: Missing Voices - Mock elections!
Registration
Officer playing solitare on laptop (No, I don't know why there's a kaunter diagnosis)
Where are our voices?
When the majority of citizens migrating are Christians...
When there has been 50 years of 'Islamization' and we are being increasingly pushed aside...
When we are shunning work in the government sector where our voices are most needed...
Are you willing to be a voice in Malaysia?
Where all our votes go
Day 4 MIA: Missing Presence
Broken families
"My family is broken....."
Will we be missing or present in restoration?
Day 4: Forum for HOT track
Day 5: Closing & passing on the baton (they made batons for all of us!)
Towards the cross...the many who have gone before us...
We had a great great camp!
Brought to you by:
FES!
Aren't they so glad that we're gone :)
My very own baton....& the town I'm to keep in prayers (one of the top towns in Malaysia where Christian presence is lacking)DID YOU KNOW?
Did you know....that if you missed out the 's' in blogspot (type: blogpot) or type blogpsot instead in the url, you'd be directed to a site that tells you about Bible prophecies being fulfilled and the end times with the sinner's prayer at the end of the page? I didn't. Not until today. Very cool. :)
Saturday, September 22, 2007
THE DAY AFTER MSK
Question: What surgical option is there for a ligament tear?
My answer: Ligament graft (got such a thing ar? :P)
Real answer: Reconstruction
Well, there seems to be a graft for almost everything...
The past month has been almost a roller coaster ride: relocating back to my church in Shah Alam, pseudobreakups, trying very hard to keep my quiet time, being 'abducted' on the 22nd of August, gobbling up the whole of Isaiah, daily emails and never-arriving snail mails, memorising lots of bones and muscles and nerves, being rehabilitated from waffles, wondering when JPA will tell me which country to rank first, trying to memorise juniors names(...again), wondering where my car is, practicing my crapping skills, learning about Jeremiah who ran around naked most of the time(and a new word-'streaker'), surprising 'one zero' for her birthday, hating pork more and more cos the caterer keeps giving me pork, remembering that i have a blog....
Picture(s) of the year:
My answer: Ligament graft (got such a thing ar? :P)
Real answer: Reconstruction
Well, there seems to be a graft for almost everything...
The past month has been almost a roller coaster ride: relocating back to my church in Shah Alam, pseudobreakups, trying very hard to keep my quiet time, being 'abducted' on the 22nd of August, gobbling up the whole of Isaiah, daily emails and never-arriving snail mails, memorising lots of bones and muscles and nerves, being rehabilitated from waffles, wondering when JPA will tell me which country to rank first, trying to memorise juniors names(...again), wondering where my car is, practicing my crapping skills, learning about Jeremiah who ran around naked most of the time(and a new word-'streaker'), surprising 'one zero' for her birthday, hating pork more and more cos the caterer keeps giving me pork, remembering that i have a blog....
Picture(s) of the year:
Being 'abducted' to midvalley
Did you know? I was 22 on the 22nd. :)
Got a very good bargain for doing this *haha*
Roller coaster going up again....when will the next descend be?
*MSK(musculoskeletal)
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
IT WILL PASS
A broken spirit and a contrite heart
You will not despise, You will not despise
You desire truth in the inward parts
A broken spirit and a contrite heart
Lord my heart is prone to wander
Prone to leave the God I love
Here's my heart Lord
Lord take and heal it
Seal it for Your courts above
When my spirit grows faint within me, it is You who know my way. Ps142:3
It will pass....
Whom have I in heaven but You? There is nothing on Earth that I desire besides You. My flesh and my heart may fail; but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion forever. Ps73:25-26
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
MORE THAN WATCHMEN WAIT FOR THE MORNING
Sometimes the company we have are not what we would have them to be…but life is like that. Like how we can’t choose the family we are born into (but I’m happy with my family la), we can’t choose the company we prefer….or else we wouldn’t need to learn how to love…
‘I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His word I put my hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning.’ Ps 130:5-6
When He comes…I will no longer struggle with sin and guilt, and loving people will be effortless. For now, I strive on still…but never without His strength and mercy. This is my hope….that that day will come…
‘….put your hope in the Lord, for with the Lord is unfailing love and with Him is full redemption.’ Ps 130:7
In my loneliness I look to You still….more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning….
‘I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His word I put my hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning.’ Ps 130:5-6
When He comes…I will no longer struggle with sin and guilt, and loving people will be effortless. For now, I strive on still…but never without His strength and mercy. This is my hope….that that day will come…
‘….put your hope in the Lord, for with the Lord is unfailing love and with Him is full redemption.’ Ps 130:7
In my loneliness I look to You still….more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning….
Monday, May 28, 2007
Saturday, May 26, 2007
.......
The tears I’ve shed the past few months can overflow a bath tub…funny huh?(fakes a laugh). Like small kid only...everytime cry…
I prayed that You would change me, to be the person You want me to be…no matter what it takes….yet I complain when You answer prayers…
How can I learn so many things at once? To respect leaders I naturally don’t, to obey when I don’t believe in what they say, to open up to people who can be not-so-sensitive, to reach out when I’m already struggling just to enjoy company…(just a few of the many, I’m sure there are lots more)
Then people around me can be divided into two groups mostly…those who say “Why you can’t just obey?” and those who say “It’s okay, you don’t have to…” I wish there was someone who would just be there and not say anything….IMU can be such a lonely place….
I prayed that You would change me, to be the person You want me to be…no matter what it takes….yet I complain when You answer prayers…
How can I learn so many things at once? To respect leaders I naturally don’t, to obey when I don’t believe in what they say, to open up to people who can be not-so-sensitive, to reach out when I’m already struggling just to enjoy company…(just a few of the many, I’m sure there are lots more)
Then people around me can be divided into two groups mostly…those who say “Why you can’t just obey?” and those who say “It’s okay, you don’t have to…” I wish there was someone who would just be there and not say anything….IMU can be such a lonely place….
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
LOOK TO HIM
For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are – yet was without sin. Hebrews 4:15
The International Standard Bible Encyclopedia puts it nicely enough :
Over against a sinful world He stands as a Saviour who is Himself without sin. His is the one life in humanity in which is presented a perfect knowledge and unbroken fellowship with the Father, undeviating obedience to His will, unswerving devotion under the severest strain of temptation and suffering to the highest ideal of goodness.
Wow. Sometimes it seems that I know You…other times, it seems that You’re above comprehension and everything imaginable to me…What kind of a person are You?
I’m feeling better…
The International Standard Bible Encyclopedia puts it nicely enough :
Over against a sinful world He stands as a Saviour who is Himself without sin. His is the one life in humanity in which is presented a perfect knowledge and unbroken fellowship with the Father, undeviating obedience to His will, unswerving devotion under the severest strain of temptation and suffering to the highest ideal of goodness.
Wow. Sometimes it seems that I know You…other times, it seems that You’re above comprehension and everything imaginable to me…What kind of a person are You?
I’m feeling better…
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Friday, March 30, 2007
WHO AM I? TELL ME WHY?!
Why do I feel this way? Is there something wrong with me? These questions have plagued me for months. Only yesterday, in frustration, I wailed to God, “I can’t understand myself! You created my inmost being…” Today, God spoke.
The NEO Inventory
No, this has nothing to do with the matrix. The NEO inventory is a copyrighted personality test (meaning you have to pay to take it) that measures differences among normal (I am normal) people and gives an idea of what makes an individual unique in his/her ways of thinking, feeling and interacting with others.
The reason why I could take this test without paying was because IMU CF got hold of our behavioral science lecturer in IMU to give a workshop on discovering our gifts and talents.
It measures five domains: openness to experience, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness and neuroticism (emotional reactivity/stability). My score sat in the very low range for extraversion and below outside the very low range for agreeableness in females.
Yes, I am introverted, reserved, serious and prefer to be alone or with a few close friends. And yes, I am hardheaded, skeptical, proud and competitive. However, I DO NOT tend to express my anger directly as my results show, and I AM NOT hostile like what my JPA psychoanalysis says. Rather, I avoid. Actually it may be because if I don’t then I’ll express my anger directly la, but so far I’ve always avoided (I am however starting to realize that avoiding may actually be worse).
So how does this translate into how I relate with people?
I am unconcerned. Unaffectionate (or rather don’t know how to be), solitary and self-sufficient.
However, my personality trait is not ‘who’ I am, it is merely ‘what’ I am.
After completing the test, the lecturer gave a short talk on how people value themselves and her own journey of discovering who she is.
Who am I? Am I a daughter? No, it is merely my role. Am I a student? No, it is merely my job. Am I a Chinese? No, it is merely my race. Who then, am I, outside all these?
On how people value themselves, there are those who say, “I am of value” because I achieve. Others…I am loved, I look good, I am needed or I have power.
What makes you feel valuable? What happens when those things are taken away? Does it mean you cease to exist? Only if it defines who you are.
I feel that I am of value because…. I achieve and I am needed. So what happens when I don’t achieve? When I am not needed? Which explains why an A minus will never be good enough and I try to juggle a myriad of things; and I do incomprehensible acts like lend my car to others more often than I use it myself. Because it reinforces my value…All 6.6 billion people on earth may love me, but if I don’t achieve or am needed…I am of no value. On the other hand, if I do achieve and am needed, it doesn’t matter so much whether I am loved.
But yet, it is who I am that defines what I do, not what I do that defines who I am.
Who am I? I am a child of God, my identity is with Christ.
What is my value? Priceless, I am worth God’s only Son.
Why is it that I keep trying to define who I am by what I do? Is it not enough that I am a child of God? Or do I believe it can be earned or I can be more worthy of it? Or is it just because I am not as matured as I think I am, so much so that whether other’s think I’m a ‘good Christian’ matters a lot? Do I merely do things so that others will think that I’m a ‘good Christian’?
How far am I required to submit to authority? Even when it breaks me?
It breaks me because I have to be what I’m not, and that is hard. Because being ‘who’ I am requires that I be the complete opposite of ‘what’ I am.
Can I be both ‘what’ I am and ‘who’ I am? It’s obviously possible because others have managed…but at a price…
It breaks me because I fail again and again…I don’t achieve, therefore I am of no value. Because I do not achieve, I am not needed…again, I am of no value.
In CF, the focus is knowing who God is and who I am in Him…reaching out is complementary and secondary. If I were to tell CF that I managed to sit down with an unbeliever during lunch and chat, they’re all gonna go “Three cheers for Linda!” clap clap…clap clap clap X3 clap clap clap clap..clap clap….. instead of asking me whether I invited the person to CF. I am of value in CF.
The feeling that I get in church is quite the opposite. I am of no value…seems to be reinforced again and again.
Why do I feel this way? Is there something wrong with me?
Why am I still hanging on in my church when I feel that I am of no value there? Because I choose not to believe in a lie, regardless of how I feel. But I still feel how I feel after one whole year and I still feel uncomfortable. Somehow, talking about it seems to reinforce the ‘I am of no value feeling’. Is it my fault? I feel that it’s time I stop being a Martha in church and just be a Mary instead. I need it badly….
The NEO test says that for most individuals, personality traits tend to be very stable in adulthood. Unless one experiences major life changes or make deliberate efforts to change, it should apply throughout the adult life (although one might score somewhat differently).
Making deliberate efforts to change…is tiring. I feel hopeless…because it seems impossible. I feel lonely…because my personality trait makes it hard to open up and people may be judgmental and not so understanding when I actually do succeed to open up. I feel stressed…because expectations are more than I am capable of. I feel immature…because I keep feeling this way….
As Sarah Ong says…I am an imperfect person, living in an imperfect world…yet trusting a perfect God…who makes all things beautiful in it’s time.
For You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Ps 139:13-14
So CF theme this month is really for me…and thanks CG people, for merely being there…Mummy is soooooo touched! (Actually, I’d prefer if they’d stop calling me that).
The NEO Inventory
No, this has nothing to do with the matrix. The NEO inventory is a copyrighted personality test (meaning you have to pay to take it) that measures differences among normal (I am normal) people and gives an idea of what makes an individual unique in his/her ways of thinking, feeling and interacting with others.
The reason why I could take this test without paying was because IMU CF got hold of our behavioral science lecturer in IMU to give a workshop on discovering our gifts and talents.
It measures five domains: openness to experience, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness and neuroticism (emotional reactivity/stability). My score sat in the very low range for extraversion and below outside the very low range for agreeableness in females.
Yes, I am introverted, reserved, serious and prefer to be alone or with a few close friends. And yes, I am hardheaded, skeptical, proud and competitive. However, I DO NOT tend to express my anger directly as my results show, and I AM NOT hostile like what my JPA psychoanalysis says. Rather, I avoid. Actually it may be because if I don’t then I’ll express my anger directly la, but so far I’ve always avoided (I am however starting to realize that avoiding may actually be worse).
So how does this translate into how I relate with people?
I am unconcerned. Unaffectionate (or rather don’t know how to be), solitary and self-sufficient.
However, my personality trait is not ‘who’ I am, it is merely ‘what’ I am.
After completing the test, the lecturer gave a short talk on how people value themselves and her own journey of discovering who she is.
Who am I? Am I a daughter? No, it is merely my role. Am I a student? No, it is merely my job. Am I a Chinese? No, it is merely my race. Who then, am I, outside all these?
On how people value themselves, there are those who say, “I am of value” because I achieve. Others…I am loved, I look good, I am needed or I have power.
What makes you feel valuable? What happens when those things are taken away? Does it mean you cease to exist? Only if it defines who you are.
I feel that I am of value because…. I achieve and I am needed. So what happens when I don’t achieve? When I am not needed? Which explains why an A minus will never be good enough and I try to juggle a myriad of things; and I do incomprehensible acts like lend my car to others more often than I use it myself. Because it reinforces my value…All 6.6 billion people on earth may love me, but if I don’t achieve or am needed…I am of no value. On the other hand, if I do achieve and am needed, it doesn’t matter so much whether I am loved.
But yet, it is who I am that defines what I do, not what I do that defines who I am.
Who am I? I am a child of God, my identity is with Christ.
What is my value? Priceless, I am worth God’s only Son.
Why is it that I keep trying to define who I am by what I do? Is it not enough that I am a child of God? Or do I believe it can be earned or I can be more worthy of it? Or is it just because I am not as matured as I think I am, so much so that whether other’s think I’m a ‘good Christian’ matters a lot? Do I merely do things so that others will think that I’m a ‘good Christian’?
How far am I required to submit to authority? Even when it breaks me?
It breaks me because I have to be what I’m not, and that is hard. Because being ‘who’ I am requires that I be the complete opposite of ‘what’ I am.
Can I be both ‘what’ I am and ‘who’ I am? It’s obviously possible because others have managed…but at a price…
It breaks me because I fail again and again…I don’t achieve, therefore I am of no value. Because I do not achieve, I am not needed…again, I am of no value.
In CF, the focus is knowing who God is and who I am in Him…reaching out is complementary and secondary. If I were to tell CF that I managed to sit down with an unbeliever during lunch and chat, they’re all gonna go “Three cheers for Linda!” clap clap…clap clap clap X3 clap clap clap clap..clap clap….. instead of asking me whether I invited the person to CF. I am of value in CF.
The feeling that I get in church is quite the opposite. I am of no value…seems to be reinforced again and again.
Why do I feel this way? Is there something wrong with me?
Why am I still hanging on in my church when I feel that I am of no value there? Because I choose not to believe in a lie, regardless of how I feel. But I still feel how I feel after one whole year and I still feel uncomfortable. Somehow, talking about it seems to reinforce the ‘I am of no value feeling’. Is it my fault? I feel that it’s time I stop being a Martha in church and just be a Mary instead. I need it badly….
The NEO test says that for most individuals, personality traits tend to be very stable in adulthood. Unless one experiences major life changes or make deliberate efforts to change, it should apply throughout the adult life (although one might score somewhat differently).
Making deliberate efforts to change…is tiring. I feel hopeless…because it seems impossible. I feel lonely…because my personality trait makes it hard to open up and people may be judgmental and not so understanding when I actually do succeed to open up. I feel stressed…because expectations are more than I am capable of. I feel immature…because I keep feeling this way….
As Sarah Ong says…I am an imperfect person, living in an imperfect world…yet trusting a perfect God…who makes all things beautiful in it’s time.
For You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Ps 139:13-14
So CF theme this month is really for me…and thanks CG people, for merely being there…Mummy is soooooo touched! (Actually, I’d prefer if they’d stop calling me that).
Saturday, December 02, 2006
MY FEELINGS LIE
"Love is a choice, not a feeling..." Teach me to keep making that choice every single new day, no matter what my feelings say....
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
AT THE CROSS
Oh Lord You’ve searched me
You know my way
Even when I fail You
I know You love me
Your Holy Presence
Surrounding me
In every season
I know You love me
I know You love me
You go before me
You shield my way
Your hand upholds me
I know You love me
At the Cross I bow my knee
Where Your blood was shed for me
There’s no greater love than this
You have overcome the grave
Your glory fills the highest place
What can separate me now?
You tore the veil
You made a way
When You said that it is done
And when the Earth fades
Falls from my eyes
And You stand before me
I know You love me
I know You love me
This song by Hillsong is dedicated to one of the great young men in their church, Jeremy Wong, who went to be with the Lord on 25th Feb 2006, to honor his life and thank God for the stand he made for Jesus Christ.
If everything was already done for me at the cross, then why do I still struggle? How far do I really believe? How much do I really understand? How well do I really know my God?
You know my way
Even when I fail You
I know You love me
Your Holy Presence
Surrounding me
In every season
I know You love me
I know You love me
You go before me
You shield my way
Your hand upholds me
I know You love me
At the Cross I bow my knee
Where Your blood was shed for me
There’s no greater love than this
You have overcome the grave
Your glory fills the highest place
What can separate me now?
You tore the veil
You made a way
When You said that it is done
And when the Earth fades
Falls from my eyes
And You stand before me
I know You love me
I know You love me
This song by Hillsong is dedicated to one of the great young men in their church, Jeremy Wong, who went to be with the Lord on 25th Feb 2006, to honor his life and thank God for the stand he made for Jesus Christ.
If everything was already done for me at the cross, then why do I still struggle? How far do I really believe? How much do I really understand? How well do I really know my God?
Friday, November 03, 2006
SPIRITUAL HYPOCHONDRIASIS
“I want to die…”
It’s just one of those times when you feel utterly defeated. You don’t want to talk about it, because every single word that comes out will ultimately serve to condemn yourself. There is no way to justify myself. I am guilty as charged, and that I know. But I am yet unrepentant. Hypochondriasis in layman terms is thinking that you are suffering from some sort to serious disease and becoming excessively obsessed with it. I’ve practically labelled myself with every negative label that I’ve heard from those referring to “not me but other Christians out there”. But they don’t know. That I am perhaps “indifferent, selfish, hypocritical…not wanting to change”. Basically, “someone you shouldn’t waste your time on.” Fact or spiritual hypochondriasis? Every single day I suspect more and more that it’s the former. I am indifferent, to the fact that preaching the gospel IS a commandment, selfish because I refuse to sacrifice my own comforts for the sake of making friends, living a double life….and the fact that I DO know, but yet refuse to change! No, frankly I’m not interested in leading outreach cell, (and I doubt whether anyone fit to be a CG leader ever says anything like this)….I’m tired of struggling, of being the ideal Christian, the ideal disciple, the ideal church member….i give up! I don’t wan’t to struggle anymore! I’m happy the way my life is….am I? Could I really be?
“A Christian who isn’t struggling is a dead Christian”. So in essence when I say that “I don’t want to struggle anymore”, I am actually saying “I want to die…”
Therefore I can't say such things....ever.
Who am I that You are mindful of me?
(And I’m glad that there is One who never gives up on me even if I and everyone else does…including myself!)
It’s just one of those times when you feel utterly defeated. You don’t want to talk about it, because every single word that comes out will ultimately serve to condemn yourself. There is no way to justify myself. I am guilty as charged, and that I know. But I am yet unrepentant. Hypochondriasis in layman terms is thinking that you are suffering from some sort to serious disease and becoming excessively obsessed with it. I’ve practically labelled myself with every negative label that I’ve heard from those referring to “not me but other Christians out there”. But they don’t know. That I am perhaps “indifferent, selfish, hypocritical…not wanting to change”. Basically, “someone you shouldn’t waste your time on.” Fact or spiritual hypochondriasis? Every single day I suspect more and more that it’s the former. I am indifferent, to the fact that preaching the gospel IS a commandment, selfish because I refuse to sacrifice my own comforts for the sake of making friends, living a double life….and the fact that I DO know, but yet refuse to change! No, frankly I’m not interested in leading outreach cell, (and I doubt whether anyone fit to be a CG leader ever says anything like this)….I’m tired of struggling, of being the ideal Christian, the ideal disciple, the ideal church member….i give up! I don’t wan’t to struggle anymore! I’m happy the way my life is….am I? Could I really be?
“A Christian who isn’t struggling is a dead Christian”. So in essence when I say that “I don’t want to struggle anymore”, I am actually saying “I want to die…”
Therefore I can't say such things....ever.
Who am I that You are mindful of me?
(And I’m glad that there is One who never gives up on me even if I and everyone else does…including myself!)
Monday, August 14, 2006
END OF 1ST YR (I'm still in medical school!)
Despite my efforts to remind myself that I have to update my blog, almost one whole month has passed, and I have only one post up before my holiday officially comes to an end. I have been busy. Really. Erm, not with studying, I have yet to revise my Sem2 stuff...despite my dear's efforts to remind me that he did and therefore I should also. Yes, leave it to me to push everything till the last four days of my 1 month plus break. I can vaguely remember telling my batchmates in the 1st week of rotations, "We HAVE to start revising NOW, or else we'll never get to it!" Ha ha...I'm a genius, I haven't got to it...yet. I'm gonna sit for the killer exam in 20 weeks! What am I doing? (Ladies and gentlemen, please count down the days to my EOS and remind me everytime you see me, I'm serious!) Quoting from Dr Timothy Song himself,"...because of orientation and IMU Cup, your respi will be screwed although it's an easy one to score. Hemato will be too difficult for you to comprehend, therefore it is also screwed. And GI will be impossible for you to finish, it is definately screwed. So, in short, your Sem3 EOS is screwed!" Yes, we all need to hear that...bummer...unless I take every lecture seriously, and knowing me...sigh. Anyway, it's a sin to fret, so I'll stop right here. I'll just trust that He'll bring me through as He always does...
Instead, I want to thank Him, for a break that I felt was well used (I think). From going house to house to pray for the Sems 1, 3 and 5 before their EOS, attending sewage treatment lectures, my KKB posting (seeing two deliveries and countless stiching), spending time with my family (how they bear my cooking and driving, plus watching those darn korean movies), learning how to cope with an angry patient (or not), the trip to Penang (spending time with matt n meeting up with ee ling), one-on-one discipleship, the Mission Trip and practices with the "tempang" Sem5s n 3s (I am Sem3 now), reading at least 4 whole books, meeting up with ECF seniors, to watching Superman and Pirates of the Carribean with very special ppl...most memorable holiday so far, definately enjoyed it more than the last one...I better hit the books pretty soon...
Instead, I want to thank Him, for a break that I felt was well used (I think). From going house to house to pray for the Sems 1, 3 and 5 before their EOS, attending sewage treatment lectures, my KKB posting (seeing two deliveries and countless stiching), spending time with my family (how they bear my cooking and driving, plus watching those darn korean movies), learning how to cope with an angry patient (or not), the trip to Penang (spending time with matt n meeting up with ee ling), one-on-one discipleship, the Mission Trip and practices with the "tempang" Sem5s n 3s (I am Sem3 now), reading at least 4 whole books, meeting up with ECF seniors, to watching Superman and Pirates of the Carribean with very special ppl...most memorable holiday so far, definately enjoyed it more than the last one...I better hit the books pretty soon...
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
DREAMS AND MIRACLES
How many of us can honestly say that we still believe in dreams and miracles? What is a miracle? Getting a parking space in a busy mall at peak hour? Is that all that He does or the greatest that He can do? Provide a parking space? Help you pass your exams or even grant you an A? What was the greatest thing that He has done for me? Get me a scholarship? Is that all? It isn’t a question we’d like to answer…because we don’t expect, therefore we don’t see…The world has taught us not to hope, no, don’t aim high, you’d most probably be disappointed…Oh, don’t dream big, you’ll never achieve what you want anyway…And we not only believe them, we even subject God to these lies…But no, it isn’t true…our God never disappoints, there is nothing that He can’t do…
We’ve been believing in lies all along…and still do…
Open our eyes to see truth in the midst of a world that is blind, that we may restore sight to a world where lies are truths and truth is considered too good to be true. How else can we show the way when we ourselves are blind?
We’ve been believing in lies all along…and still do…
Open our eyes to see truth in the midst of a world that is blind, that we may restore sight to a world where lies are truths and truth is considered too good to be true. How else can we show the way when we ourselves are blind?
THE STORY
I remember in standard one, we had to tell a story in Bahasa Malaysia, and how I stood up in front of the entire class and told the story of creation and the fall AND got an A for it (cos unlike the rest, I was spontaneous and didn’t need to read from a scrap of paper). No, the point of this post is not to brag about how I got an A, it‘s the fact that I was seven and I stood up in front of my class, and told a story from the Bible. No, I didn’t tell them how Christ died for us on the cross to pay for our sins then rose again on the third day (I doubt I really understood the significance of it then anyway). But still, it was a part of the Bible AND my classmates loved it. Then the very next day I brought my book of children’s bible stories to school, and showed my classmates...I was telling the world (then my world was my class) at the age of seven…And now, to just approach the subject of Christianity with non believers, a million what ifs would cross my mind. I try not to sound too offensive...Oh, you don’t have to believe it but this is what I believe…What has happened? The truth is, many would want to know…but we’re afraid of telling them. Why? When 16 years ago it didn’t require any thought at all, just tell…That was child-like faith. We’ve been robbed of it, because of the very way we’ve been brought up, we’ve been taught to fear…to fear talking of your religion as if it was the only true one, converting Malays, not living up to what we preach, being seen as pushy by others. A million precautions, taboos, what ifs…What has the world done to us? To me? We were called, not to have minds that can prove all the others wrong, nor to have that magnetic charisma that draws the crowd, nor superhuman organizational skills to put up the greatest, most perfect evangelistic meeting. Sometimes we think that so much is required of us, when all He wants is just child-like faith and a willing heart. Will I be able to get a glimpse of what it was like to be that seven year old kid again? They’re all lies, and we don’t even realize that we’re falling for them…
You said that You are the truth and that the truth will set us free…
To me then, it was just a great story, and I wanted to share it with my class..
Now I know, it wasn’t just any story, and the God in that story isn’t just any god, He IS God…why am I not sharing?
No, you don’t have to go sit down in some quiet place and close your eyes and concentrate really hard to hear God (not always). He’s in everything we see and hear…if only we’d take time to look for Him. It was just the memory of a book, the sight of it, the remembrance of an event…and everything He had to say about it…
You said that You are the truth and that the truth will set us free…
To me then, it was just a great story, and I wanted to share it with my class..
Now I know, it wasn’t just any story, and the God in that story isn’t just any god, He IS God…why am I not sharing?
No, you don’t have to go sit down in some quiet place and close your eyes and concentrate really hard to hear God (not always). He’s in everything we see and hear…if only we’d take time to look for Him. It was just the memory of a book, the sight of it, the remembrance of an event…and everything He had to say about it…
Thursday, July 13, 2006
THE POEM
Five months of longing, of being apart,
So much to tell, where shall he start,
He’s happy, he’s thrilled, he’s giddy, he’s gay,
Because he likes me, more than he can say.
So in poetry he writes, with poetry he'll tell,
Words from his heart, from his feelings as well,
That he’s fallen for me, it’s just like a dream,
Nothing’s quite real, or how it should seem.
He wants to hold me, to tell me he does care,
He’d like to assure me, he’ll always be there,
Yet he knows, the future’s not his nor mine,
It belongs to God, may His glory shine.
Through both our lives, through each of our days,
Yes, may we always be found, following His ways,
To seek His will, to seek His face,
To trust in Him, and find His grace.
That even if, we should be apart,
We’d be closer together, near to God’s heart,
Than we’d ever could be, choosing on our own,
To be together, and not be alone.
And taking this step of faith, yes I do fear,
But still will I choose, to be with my heart’s dear,
For though the future, it’s not ours to see,
In His great arms of love, forever we shall be.
So much to tell, where shall he start,
He’s happy, he’s thrilled, he’s giddy, he’s gay,
Because he likes me, more than he can say.
So in poetry he writes, with poetry he'll tell,
Words from his heart, from his feelings as well,
That he’s fallen for me, it’s just like a dream,
Nothing’s quite real, or how it should seem.
He wants to hold me, to tell me he does care,
He’d like to assure me, he’ll always be there,
Yet he knows, the future’s not his nor mine,
It belongs to God, may His glory shine.
Through both our lives, through each of our days,
Yes, may we always be found, following His ways,
To seek His will, to seek His face,
To trust in Him, and find His grace.
That even if, we should be apart,
We’d be closer together, near to God’s heart,
Than we’d ever could be, choosing on our own,
To be together, and not be alone.
And taking this step of faith, yes I do fear,
But still will I choose, to be with my heart’s dear,
For though the future, it’s not ours to see,
In His great arms of love, forever we shall be.
ROTATIONS
It’s not that I didn’t have anything to blog about for the past two weeks; you could say that life in IMU has really hit me in the face. System courses, this IS the real thing (although CVS is supposedly the easiest system in IMU). Now I see why some become disillusioned, and studying becomes the main priority in life, this is when all they look forward to is a slip of paper that bears the lone triangle. I am reminded that I too, could easily fall into that, I have every reason to….to fulfill my dreams of a certain University, to meet the expectations of my dad and worse still my own, to live up to the image of a scholar and also the image of a Christian….but it’s not all about me, how much I try or even how pure my motives seem to be. It’s times like this that I realize in comparison, You never asked more than I could give, yet You asked for ALL that I have, along with all that I am. Hmm…..question is can I give my all? Yes, not by might nor by power, but by Your Spirit. I will hang on to that, I give my IMU days into Your hands….
Rotations is the perfect time for relaxing, but of course not a time to be idle, which I hope I will not be…please guard me against that, I have a tendency to oversleep these days. So far had lectures on sewage treatment (yes, it’s related to medicine…preventive side), just spent almost two hours studying pictures of parasites (those darn Plasmodiums…grrr), will soon be going off to the famous KKB posting where we’re sent to observe clinic settings for five days…then there’s always the Orang Asli mission trip in August to look forward to…bathing in the river, sarong and all…wonder if I’ll manage? The medical semester is almost nearing it’s end, now only the slaughtering of Sem5 left…I can hear the shouts of the Sem1 ppl getting their End of Sem results right now….that seemed so long ago…yup, the entire Sem2, in just one blink of an eye…but I’m glad.
Rotations is the perfect time for relaxing, but of course not a time to be idle, which I hope I will not be…please guard me against that, I have a tendency to oversleep these days. So far had lectures on sewage treatment (yes, it’s related to medicine…preventive side), just spent almost two hours studying pictures of parasites (those darn Plasmodiums…grrr), will soon be going off to the famous KKB posting where we’re sent to observe clinic settings for five days…then there’s always the Orang Asli mission trip in August to look forward to…bathing in the river, sarong and all…wonder if I’ll manage? The medical semester is almost nearing it’s end, now only the slaughtering of Sem5 left…I can hear the shouts of the Sem1 ppl getting their End of Sem results right now….that seemed so long ago…yup, the entire Sem2, in just one blink of an eye…but I’m glad.
Monday, June 26, 2006
GOTTA KEEP SINGING
Another rainy day
I can’t recall heaven’s sunshine on my face
All I feel is pain
All I wanna do is walk out of this place
But when I am stuck, I can’t move
When I don’t know what I should do
When I wonder whether I’ll ever make it through….
I gotta keep singing
I gotta keep praising Your name
You’re the one that’s keeping my heart beat
I gotta keep singing
I gotta keep praising Your name
And that’s the only way that I’ll find me
Can I climb up in Your lap?
I don’t wanna leave
Jesus sing over me
I gotta keep singing…
You’re everything I need
(by:mercyme)
I can’t recall heaven’s sunshine on my face
All I feel is pain
All I wanna do is walk out of this place
But when I am stuck, I can’t move
When I don’t know what I should do
When I wonder whether I’ll ever make it through….
I gotta keep singing
I gotta keep praising Your name
You’re the one that’s keeping my heart beat
I gotta keep singing
I gotta keep praising Your name
And that’s the only way that I’ll find me
Can I climb up in Your lap?
I don’t wanna leave
Jesus sing over me
I gotta keep singing…
You’re everything I need
(by:mercyme)
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