TIRED?

Am loving the late night teas and early morning sahos with You. :)

Just another day someone asked me in church, "Why do you never look tired? Do you really study medicine? My other medic friends always look tired."

I would like to think that it's because I know the importance of waiting on You to renew my strength. Then again, the fact that I'm quite slack probably has something to do with it as well! XD

Help. I need to study.

MARCHING ON

On the day the tabernacle, the Tent of the Testimony, was set up, the cloud covered it. From evening till morning the cloud above the tabernacle looked like fire. That is how it continued to be; the cloud covered it, and at night it looked like fire. Whenever the cloud lifted from above the Tent, the Israelites set out; wherever the cloud settled, the Israelites encamped. At the LORD's command the Israelites set out, and at his command they encamped. As long as the cloud stayed over the tabernacle, they remained in camp. When the cloud remained over the tabernacle a long time, the Israelites obeyed the LORD's order and did not set out. Sometimes the cloud was over the tabernacle only a few days; at the LORD's command they would encamp, and then at his command they would set out. Sometimes the cloud stayed only from evening till morning, and when it lifted in the morning, they set out. Whether by day or by night, whenever the cloud lifted, they set out. Whether the cloud stayed over the tabernacle for two days or a month or a year, the Israelites would remain in camp and not set out; but when it lifted, they would set out. At the LORD's command they encamped, and at the LORD's command they set out. They obeyed the LORD's order, in accordance with his command through Moses. (Numbers 9:15-23)

I’ve never paid much attention to this passage in previous readings (which, for Numbers is like years ago!). I think when we read these sort of passages we tend to gloss over it like how one would study history. But BSF covered it two weeks ago and yesterday I was reminded of it yet again by one of the girls in my cell group, whose life is a practical example of this passage.

She came over to Melbourne as a student, graduated and found a job, an apartment, a future husband, ministries and friends and brothers and sisters; like most people. Of course, she plans to return to Malaysia/Singapore one day – but well, it has always been “one day” in the near future…that was, until she told us yesterday that she will be handing in her resignation letter end of this week. It was so sudden, so totally unexpected. But the cloud lifted for her, and she is moving forward deliberately in obedience.

Some are waiting impatiently for the cloud to lift…and it seems like God is taking forever.

For others, the cloud lifts when they least expect it to…sometimes inconveniently too soon.

Yet we all know that sooner or later the cloud will lift, and it will be time to move on.

And though for each of us it might sometimes seem too long or too soon, we know that His timing is impeccable and perfect. Our part is to wait when He says wait, and to move when He says move, whether it is one night or two days or a month or a year; morning or evening – to trust and obey, and to always fix our eyes on the cloud for direction.

Read the passage again. Now everytime I read it, I just go, “Wow..”.

The cloud is a reminder of God’s grace and His sovereignity. His grace is seen in His willingness to be with His people and to direct them clearly in their march. His sovereignity is seen in that He determined when and where they should march. God did not explain these leadings. The people simply had to move when the cloud moved and stop when the cloud stopped. (BSF notes)

May we all find courage and speed to move forward when the cloud lifts for us, and strength and patience to wait when it still covers the tabernacle in our lives.

March on, sister! :)

IN PAIN

‘You see,’ Antonin told me, ‘it’s unpatriotic to be a Christian in Czechoslovakia these days. Some of these people have been blackballed at work. Many have missed out on education. And that’ – he took a small box from the hands of a young man who stood beside him – ‘is why they want you to have this.’

The young man was speaking very earnestly to me in Czech.

‘Take this to Holland with you,’ Antonin translated, ‘and when people ask you about it, tell them about us and remind them that we are part of the Body, too, and that we are in pain.

I took the box and opened it. Inside was a silver lapel ornament in the shape of a tiny cup. I had seen several of the young people wearing them and wondered what they were.

Antonin was pinning it to my jacket. ‘This is the symbol of the Church in Czechoslovakia. We call it the Cup of Suffering.’

Brother Andrew (Founder Open Doors International) - God's Smuggler

I remember once watching a video of Christians in China back when persecution was still at its worst. It was a scene of Christians kneeling down by the river with their hands lifted up as they sang. And as they sang... scores of police came and bludgeoned them with clubs. Yet they did not move, they kept singing by the river. That imagery has stayed with me since.

The cost of discipleship...

When one part of the Body suffers, the rest suffers with it. If we do not somehow suffer along with them nor feel compelled to do anything, then something must be very wrong... is it not? Are we even part of the Body then?

BLESSED & EXTREMELY BLESSED

I’ve always felt blessed, yet there are certain times when one feels extremely blessed. =D

As Edmund said during the sharing at the retreat (quoted rather loosely), “The temporary things in life would have no value if that was all we had, without God.” How true.

Knowing that You are my portion forever gives me the security and freedom to enjoy the present as it is – temporary, yet no less wonderful. No ‘what if’s or ‘should not’s. No wanting for more or wishing that things would last longer. No striving or grappling in the dark for that perfection that seems so far away, because I already have Perfection Himself.

So I am thanking You this night for the eternal as well as the temporary. I am extremely blessed - because my King sees me, has saw it fit to dwell with me, and cares enough to elevate me to where He is.

Because You fill this hole in my heart that no one else can, and topped it off with the icing too! (I think this is the first time I've seen a birthday cake with a hole in the middle! So symbolic...I like!)

I thoroughly loved this weekend, so much more than words can express or convey. I enjoyed every minute and every second of it - for reasons more than one. Thank You. :)

By day the LORD directs his love, at night his song is with me – a prayer to the God of my life. Ps 42:8

THE ROCKING HORSE

There once lived a little girl. She was happy because she was on a vacation in a cozy little village over the seas with her Daddy. It was such a dreamy place. She loved walking along the serene streets and gazing at trinkets on display in the windows of shops. You see, little girls learn to window shop pretty early on in life. One day, she passed by a particular shop, that had on display a particular rocking horse. It wasn’t just any rocking horse – it was quite special. Slowly yet surely, the passing days found the little girl returning to this particular shop, to gaze at this particular rocking horse.

But of course the little girl knew that Daddy would not get her that particular rocking horse, nor did she ever thought of asking. She knew that when the vacation ends and they returned to their very own city, Daddy would get her any rocking horse she wanted - if she wanted.

So without a word, on a cold winter’s night, she climbed into Daddy’s big arms while he was sitting in his chair. Searching his eyes, she saw that he understood all. And there she laid into the night, with her face buried in his chest, vowing in her little heart to not walk along that particular street again. She knew that her Daddy loved her, and that was enough. And it is true, he did love her…very much.

And that rocking horse? It was too small for her anyway, no matter how special it was.

=)

For all the times when I want to be there with people who are personally important to me but cannot because there is so much to do and so little time (and medicine is only one part of it!), I thank You that I not only have one year and 5 months...

...but all eternity...

...because of what You've done.

Thank You for the price You paid.